Aaron Keyes
The last thing you want to do, in the middle of a fight, is... NOTHING. Unless, of course, you expect someone bigger to show up and fight for you. It’s...
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Psalm 62
I had the honor of connecting with Stuart Townend a few years ago. I’d long respected him as a worship leader and song writer (He wrote “In Christ Alone,” “How Deep the Father’s Love for us,” and many of my all time favorite worship songs), and he was gracious enough to have me into his home a few times while I was in the UK. We sat down in his living room one day and came up with the melody to the verse of the song, and at first all we had was a melody. We began talking about what we wanted the melody to be about, and we’d both recently been meditating in Psalm 62. Stuart shared some of what He’d learned, and I sent him all of my notes from my journal, and then the verses were sort of formed. The chorus came last, and I don’t remember where the idea came to put the ancient hymn in as a bridge, but it just felt right, especially as it echoed the sentiment of the chorus. We ended up sending a few different versions of the song back and forth over emails, until we finally landed on where it is to this day! I guess the driving messages behind the song would be about resting in God alone, delighting in his presence, trusting his faithfulness, and celebrating his victory over sin and death. I’ve used the song all over the world because it so easily connects to so many different sermon themes; and because of it being a modern hymn, it’s fit into many different worship contexts as well, whether ultra-conservative churches or free flowing charismatic expressions.
Not Guilty Anymore
In John 8 an adulterous woman is thrown at the feet of Jesus. The Law required her to be put to death by stoning, and so the Pharisees wanted to test Jesus by setting him up in a catch 22. We know the story: Jesus stoops down and begins scribbling in the sand, and before long every single accuser has left the temple, speechless, and itʼs just Jesus and this woman remaining. Jesus says, “Woman, were are they? Did no one condemn you?” She replies, “No one, Lord.” And Jesus says, “I do not condemn you, either go from now on and sin no more.”(John 8: 1-11) I remember meditating on this passage a few years ago. I remember visualizing the scene, seeing the angry mob, ready and eager to inflict their deserved judgment. I remember feeling their anger, and feeling the womanʼs helplessness. As I imagined Jesus stooping down, writing in the sand, I heard the sounds of grace: stones striking dust and sand. One by one, the angry mob actually acquiesced, and the only sound to be heard was that of slow, shuffling footsteps, and rocks falling from shaking hands to a dusty temple floor.All of their indictments, condemnation, and accusations had fallen to the ground in the presence of Jesus. This woman was clearly guilty, and yet Jesus--the only one actually able to condemn--chose not to condemn. I was leading worship after hearing Dr. Alan Jackson preach on this very passage, and I spontaneously began to sing over the room, “Can you hear the sounds of grace? Condemnation falling to the floor? Youʼre not guilty anymore,Youʼre not filthy anymore.” I sang it over and over as the room received the forgiveness of God, until finally I dismissed everybody; yet, nobody moved an inch. Everyone was in awe of what God was doing.That was the summer of 2006. Iʼll never forget because Germany was hosting the World Cup that summer, and for the first time ever, every single game of the World Cup was going to be broadcast in high definition! I saved enough money to buy a big-screen TV just in time for the tournament, and for the first few weeks it was heaven on earth. We filled my basement with friends, we screamed,laughed, hugged, and rejoiced for those few weeks. Until I went back out on the road, that is. I came home a week later and my wife said, “Youʼre not going to be too happy.” “Why not? What happened?” I asked.“Your son (to remain unnamed) broke your television.” How bad?” “Pretty bad.”I turned the corner; only to behold my precious portal to footballing bliss had been all but dismantled with metal, glass, and plastic all over the floor! Broken was an understatement; exploded wouldʼve been more like it. (Random aside: it turns out, Xbox controllers can do a lot of damage if hurled with enough velocity at a certain trajectory!) I had to deal with my little guy (he was 4 at the time), so we went up to his room.I sat him down on his bed to talk through what heʼd done, and what kind of punishment he felt it deserved. I ended up opting for my own idea of what kind of punishment I felt he deserved. After some time to think, talk, and pray, I finally had to punish him. He cried, and I think I cried! I then wanted to speak forgiveness over him, so I said, “Son, look me in the eye.” He didnʼt move. His head was in his hands. I said it again, “Son, look here. I want to tell you something.” Again - no movement. I took my hands and actually lifted his head up by his chin, so we were eye to eye, and I said,“Buddy, I love you, I forgive you, and this is all done.” The next morning I was reading Psalm 3. In verse 7 it says, “You oh Lord are a shield about me, youʼre my glory, and the lifter of my head.” When I read that, the Lord spoke ot me and it was as if I was back in my sonʼs room sitting at the foot of his bed, only this time, I was the little boy, and God was the loving Father wanting to speak forgiveness. Iʼd spent the better part of my life living in guilt. Maybe it was growing up in fundamentalism, maybe part of it was being a pastorʼs kid, maybe it was any number of things, but Iʼd somehow let guilt become a dominant factor in my life. Iʼd beat myself up for making mistakes, and Iʼd really lay on the guilt if my wife or kids made any mistakes. But that morning, I felt God saying, “Look at me, I want to tell you something.” I didnʼt want to look at him! I didnʼt feel I deserved to! Yet he came to me, and with his hands that spread out the stars in the sky, he lifted up my head, and I heard him say to me, “I love you, I forgive you, and this is all done.”It was the strangest freedom to feel. So much became so clear: I didnʼt want guilt to drive my life; I wanted freedom! I didnʼt want shame to be my banner; His banner over me is love! So many verses stuck out. Romans 8 says There is now therefore no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. I am in Christ Jesus, so then I must not live one more day under the condemnation of the enemy. It took me the better part of 25 years, but I was finally starting to grasp the depth of the grace and mercy of God. The rest of the song came soon after hearing From the Lord on that morning. I never expected anyone to hear the song, and never anticipated anything happening with it; I only thought it was a gift God had given me to remind me of the freedom for which Heʼd died. 2 Corinthians 5 was the coup de grace: “He who knew no sin became sin for us,that might become the righteousness of God in Him.” I have become righteous because of the cross of Jesus. Iʼve become blameless, spotless, whole. All because of the Lamb who was slain.It finally sank in, and continues to, even to this day. May the freedom, deliverance, and wholeness bought by the blood of Jesus be very real and effectual in your experience today. May it not be theoretical or simply theological, but may you taste, see, and know the mercy and grace of Jesus. May you hear him say, just as did I, “Child, I love You, Youʼre not guilty anymore.”
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